Wednesday, March 31, 2010

A Loose Amalgam of Real Money

Well Obama finally chucked one to Real America.

The president's interview with Matt Lauer was characterized by a clearly agitated and arrogant Obama, who testily interrupted America's Interviewer, repeatedly called him a "douchenozzle on 'high'" even after it stopped being funny, and at one point appeared to strike Lauer on the cheek with an open palm in response to a question about the president's Middle East peace plan. Lauer did manage to wrestle and pin down the president on one question in particular in which he asked Obama about his impressions of the the American Liberty Rebirth Movement, commonly referred to condescendingly by the MSM as "Tea Party activists," "teabaggers," or the "get off my lawners."


Um wow. A "loose amalgam of forces," some of whom are "legitimately concerned" with the role of the federal government in American governance, others of whom are "dug in ideologically" in the belief that he's a foreign-born socialist and who probably will not be "convinced" otherwise? I have never been more offended by such an even-tempered, thought-out, and accurate portrayal of a minority of Americans by my commander-in-chief.  This man is a disgrace.

A point about presidential interviews: What the "mainstream media sans Fox News" considers deference to the Office of the President--mainly allowing the presidential interviewee the ability to answer a question before offering a rebuttal in the form of another question in an effort to expose the perceived misstatement or dodge committed by said presidential interviewee--Fox News sees as weak, fluffy, ineffective, lap-doggyism.  But let's just imagine that instead of elf-man Bret Baier interviewing President Obama, we had the nasally David Shuster interviewing George W. Bush in the same manner. Now imagine the conservative outrage over the left's blatant disregard for the dignity and respect deserved of our commander-in-chief. Imagine the indignation of the likes of Limbaugh, Hannity, and Beck over the condescending, insulting breach of decorum that the White House and the office is due. Now look me in the face with a straight expression on yours and tell me this scenario would not have played out exactly like I described it. You can't do it. When an R is in office, the right becomes the defenders of the grace and glory of the presidency; when a D is in office, they must do everything in their power to tear down the walls of the People's House and expose the cockroaches inside to the light of day.  Bret Baier is a common man's journalist who is simply, earnestly striving to obtain the truth. Charles Gibson and Katie Couric on the other hand are elitists who have no business being so crass in asking a candidate for the second highest office in the land if she understands the Bush Doctrine or, you know, reads.

Finally, a quick read of the transcript of the Obama-Baier interview reveals six moments of "Cross Talk," including this journalistic gem:

OBAMA: And, Bret, let me tell you something, the fact of the matter is that for the vast majority of people, their health care is not going to change because right now they're getting a better deal. The only thing that is going to change for [the vast majority of Americans] is, is that they're going to have more security under their [health] insurance and they're going to have a better situation when it comes to if they lose their job, heaven forbid, or somebody gets sick with a preexisting condition, they'll have more security. But, so — so —

BAIER: So how can you —

OBAMA: — the notion that —

BAIER: — guarantee that they're not going to —

OBAMA: — so but —

BAIER: — they're going to be able to keep their doctor —

OBAMA: Bret, you've got to let me finish my answers —

BAIER: Sir, I know you don't like to filibuster, but —

OBAMA: Well, I'm trying to answer your question and you keep on interrupting.

The sign of a truly award-winning journalistic interview surely is when the interviewer talks over the interviewee during his answers so much that you can't even hear them, thus canonizing the fearless interviewer as a mighty hero of free speech and the press!

Maybe Bret would do better to submit these soft-ballers to the judging panel:

BRET BAIER: Today you were talking about keeping America safe. Do you believe that there hasn't been a terrorist attack on U.S. soil in more than seven years because of the policies your administration has implemented?

Yes, oh dearest President Bush, explain to the American people just why you are so good at keeping America jihad-free!

BRET BAIER: Do you worry at all that the incoming [Obama] administration will undo some of the things that you say have kept America safe?

Here's the's a lobber really, and Bush smacks it out of the park deeeeep into left-wing terrorist appeasement field (Though in reality he shanked it into foul territory so as to not immediately handicap an incoming administration on such a critical effort. Kudos, Mr. President)!

BRET BAIER: When you're leaving now, your approval rating is hovering around 30 percent or a little below. It's been below 40 percent for 27 straight months. And that matches Harry Truman's string of sub-40 percent approval ratings. And you'll pass him this month unless there's a big surge that we don't know about. Weigh in on the public opinion, you know, the feelings about public opinion throughout-- do you care?

Please, offer to us your deserved place in the canon of unfairly rejected yet ultimately considered visionary and honorable leaders like Truman. Jesus?

BRET BAIER: What are you reading now?

Now here's a doozy for Obama. Which one is it Barry? The little red book or Mein Kampf?

BRET BAIER: Were you angry [about the economy possibly sinking into depression under your watch]?

Please Mr. President, describe how you feel. I will drink my toe-shavings in bourbon when a Fox News interviewer asks this president how something made him feel.

BRET BAIER: You have your ideas about how and when the government should step in and intervene with this amount of money based on advice from Secretary Paulson. Now Democrats are gonna take control of the White House and Congress. Are you concerned that you've created a government intervention monster here?

Let's pause here folks. Analyze this brilliant line of "fair and balanced" questioning with me for a moment. What exactly is the line "you have your ideas about [government intervention in capital markets]," when juxtaposed with Democrat-controlled "government intervention monster" supposed to accomplish?  Perhaps this construction--pitting President Bush's SEVEN HUNDRED BILLION DOLLAR *sadly necessary* BAILOUT of the financial industry (hedged, of course, by "based on advice from Secretary Paulson," as if to remove some shred of accountability from the man who ultimately approved the THREE PAGE bill) against the evil out of control Democratic intervention monster!!!--is meant to salvage what was left of the legacy of a president to whom Mr. Baier's network had been all too favorable in its unbiased portrayal. Anyone care to explain why Mr. Baier felt it necessary to include Democrats in a question about a Republican orchestrated government intervention? Oh yeah, cuz Democrats LOVE to government takeover the shit out of everything, now I remember. Let's compare this line of questioning--in which Baier is seeking the fair and balanced truth about the emergency authorization of a trillion less three hundred billion U.S. dollars to effectively nationalize the financial markets temporarily written in a bill shorter than this blog post--to this question concerning President Obama's health care reform initiative:

BAIER: Mr. President, you couldn't tell me what the special deals are that are in or not today.

OBAMA: I just told you what was in and what was not in.

BAIER: Is Connecticut in?

OBAMA: Connecticut — what are you specifically referring to?

BAIER: The $100 million for the hospital? Is Montana in for the asbestos program? Is — you know, listen, there are peoplethis is real money, people are worried about this stuff.

OBAMA: And as I said before, this — the final provisions are going to be posted for many days before this thing passes, but —

BAIER: Let me get to some of the specifics on substance not process.

OBAMA: The only thing —



Obama OWNED! This is REAL MONEY okay?  While Bret Baier was forced to set up Bush for the spike with questions like "are you kinda angry about almost fucking the economy forever?" while brushing over that president's "ideas" about government intervention to the tune of oh, say, $700,000,000,000.00 taxpayer dollars to Wall Street bankers who fucked us all over with little to no strings attached or provisions for transparency, he was quietly dreaming of the day when he could repeatedly talk truth to power and talk about people who are worried about the allegedly unknown contents of a bill that has been debated not for mere hours but for a whole year!

As if all this weren't enough, Baier had the audacity to end the interview with this cunt-fuck comment:

BAIER: I apologize for interrupting you, sir. I tried to get the most bang for our buck here.

Oh, wait. That's legit. I guess I should've just read that last line first and saved me a bunch of time and outrage better directed here.

Step into the rain:


  1. Aw, did you write this with me in mind? Wah wah, I'm being cheeky.

  2. I always write with you in mind. Your agreement is my white whale.